Magnets

It is physically unnatural for mother's to leave their young. As I watched Norm drive away with Josie and Owen unsuspecting in the backseat, my whole body lurched forward like a magnet drawn to metal object that was moving in the opposite direction.

As I waited in the line at airport security, I looked around and couldn't believe how boring it was to wait in line without having to entertain a toddler. Without having to say, "no don't hang on that," or "get back here or we are going home." Without pulling a toddler into my arms and pointing out the other children who were behaving.

There was no one else to worry about, no one else to watch over, no one else's stuff weighing down my carry-on. It was everything I thought that I needed but nothing that truly mattered.

I can't lie and say I didn't enjoy the night of uninterrupted sleep. And its nice to have conversations with people and not worry about whats happening in the other room. But I know that my maternal instricts will always pull me towards them. My heart will always draw me to them no matter which one of us is trying to move in the opposite direction. And I should just feel fortunate for the days when all we have to do is be together.