Meanest Mom in Mountain View

I'd like to issue a formal apology to my children. For the way that I treated them, the way that I talked to them and how often I got mad at them for things that had nothing do with them.

I was much more stressed out today than I realized, heading into back to back weeks of Norm traveling to different countries. Fortunately for me, he is coming home for a few days in between, even though its back tracking quite a bit to go from Montreal, back to Mountain View, and then back to Europe less than 48 hours later.

I was impressed at how calm I was in the days approaching the first trip. This must be the new me, I thought. The me that's so happy in Mountain View that she doesn't even mind if her husband has to leave the country for a few days.

I'm pretty sure my neighbors thought about calling protective services when I was yelling at Owen for wiping his syrup covered hands all over Josie's face. And I think even Josie was shocked when I was yelling at her for not putting her shoes on fast enough. If there is one thing Josie does fast, it's get ready to go somewhere.

I almost left them at Starbucks, and not on accident this time. I didn't have the energy to encourage them with a treat or threaten them with a punishment and neither followed me out the door of Starbucks. Instead they stood in the window and watched me get into the car. Probably relieved to spend a few hours at a police station instead of dealing with the meanest mom in Mountain View.

The day got a little better as I started to realize that my anger wasn't really directed at them but rather a manifestation of how scared I was to be all alone, even in Mountain View. It also helped that in the height of my rage, Josie, said, "excuse me mom." I stopped yelling long enough to hear her out and she looked me right the eyes and said, "Mom, you being very scary today."

I guess the scary crab was back. And this time Josie wasn't afraid to put the crab in her place.